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Bench Talk / Off The Wire

Tushy Situation


By Fred Wallace

 Hi, this is Fred Wallace with " Off the Wire "


Every now and then you encounter a piece of information or a news release and you wonder, ' is this a scam ? Am I being played here ? '

Last week, New Era, the global sports headware and clothing apparel company asked to be released from the naming rights and sponsorship agreement with the Buffalo Bills Stadium in Orchard Park, New York.

The request made sense; New Era Cap Company recently laid off more than 100 employees at their Buffalo-based headquarters.

I trusted that information.

What followed made me sceptical.......

A release from TUSHY, the provider of bidet attachments that transforms any traditional toilet into a booty wonderland, announced a bid of up to $12,500,000 for naming rights to the Bills National Football League stadium.

TUSHY would like to rename the stadium "TUSHY Stadium."

Additionally, TUSHY is offering to deploy portable toilets equipped with its bidet across parking lots and tailgating venues for every Bills home game, which I would assume would be welcomed by the delicate souls that form the Bills Mafia.

Video footage has illustrated the Bills Mafia drinking alcohol out of bowling balls, jumping through tables, and spraying ketchup on each other among other dainty activities.

Finally, assuming the naming rights offer is accepted, TUSHY would like to work to bring a college football bowl game to Orchard Park and host the first-ever.......... "Toilet Bowl."

After some quick double checks, I was able find confirmation that the TUSHY bid was legitimate.......and not a bunch of crap.


I'm Fred Wallace


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